Reading: self-examination of susceptibility to betrayal in How could you do this to ME?"
Friday, Sept. 19, 2003 - 5:50 a.m.
Cost of the War in Iraq
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Another week has slipped by! Friday morning... the problem with staying up (as if there is just ONE problem) past 5am is they stop talking like it is the night on the radio and begin saying "good morning!!" and speaking to people starting their day. Dysphoria!!
urk... i have washed my hands and not put lotion on them, and as i type they feel like dried out mummy's hands... papery skin whispering as my bones move them around, dustily sliding against each other.
... an ok day... tendency to run off into self-criticism, but i find i dont wallow as in the past. Better self-esteem. yes, a positive change.
Didnt get enough work done, but had some interesting day bits.... I discovered a photo collection book... rather amateurishly done, with a sort of "clipboard" presentation... the sheets of paper are on a sheet of coroplast, held on by that sort of screw used in photo albums as a binder,with a cover of flexible clear plastic. Strange and expensive ($30)... the guy in the bookstore asked why i didnt just look for such photos in the library if it was expensive... I replied that is like saying "can't you just get fruit in an orchard?" if one complains about the price of a fruit basket in a shop...
The book is a collection of photos (and it turns out most of them are personal family photos of various people, as well as some from obscure archives... ie hard to find or out of reach) from 1900-1963 of the area in Montreal known as Griffintown... it was an Irish slum below the tracks, bordering the Lachine canal for a hundred years. Apparently it was razed for the Olympics in the 60's. The photos are priceless black and white history pics of church groups, friends on stoops, corner coffeeshops, kids in the choir etc... beautiful. I am especially interested since I lived in the middle of that area on Murray Street in 1987-88. It has a lot of empty lots now, dotted with older residential buildings, a few industrial sites, and right behind our backyard, a horse stable for caleches... the horsedrawn carriages that ferry tourists around Old Montreal... the air always smelled like a mixture of horses and hops, from the Molson Brewery that was around the corner (now turned into a fancy dancy college).
In the map from the past, there is a Leo Leonard's Horse Palace situated behind our old apartment... Yes, Leo is still there, and my girlfriend visited him and his horses often! But most of the rest is gone... St. Anne's Cathedral, with it's beautiful Our Mother of Perpetual Help Shrine is now an empty lot with trees. St Anne's Kindergarten, Griffintown Boys and Girls Club, St Anns Young Men's Society... all gone. AS is the Horse Market, all the schools, pubs, King's Transfer Vanlines is still there... walked past it everyday on my way home.
All in all a fascinating book... I should call up my ex and share it with her: she would be fascinated.
Besides that... great Flamenco class today... this is a class for femmedommes in the making... hands on hips, eyes looking forward, head lifted pridefully, shoulders leading with a sort of prideful disdain... We are learning to dance to Carmen in the fan class, and to a male song in the regular class. We will start to music next class. Stomp stomp!! I realize i must get my stomping stamina up, as well as my endurance in arms and shoulders. All of that puffed up chest with arms out is quite exhausting!!!
Too tired to think of anything else interesting today... zzzzzzzzz
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Goodbye Michael. May your next life be kinder to you. - Thursday, Jun. 25, 2009
*inspired by Chaosdaily