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Hold on to what is good even if it is a handful of earth.
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Hold on to what you must do even if it is a long way from here.
Hold on to life even when it is easier letting go.
Hold on to my hand even when I have gone away from you.
- Pueblo Blessing

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Sunday, Apr. 03, 2005 - 2:27 p.m.

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WARNING!!!! if you know me personally, you may read my diary, but if you do, you take the chance of hearing things you don't want to know, misunderstanding what I've written and being hurt by it. If you are unsure if it is ok to read, save yourself and me the grief and heartache, and ask first!!! Please note that this is a DIARY, ie my subjective feelings, hearsay, suppositions, and outpourings of ranting of the moment. It does not represent objective news, the whole of what I think of a topic or someone, or even a thought-out representation of any of the above. Keep that in mind. Thanks. * Here is a Diary Etiquette Read Me.

Time Changes Fuck Over the Day


This is why I like to do things myself.

It is 3:27, except for Diaryland which is behind the whole world, and perhaps except for Disappearing Boy. Goddamn. He was supposed to be here at 3pm (when it wasn't pissing rain as if the hurricanes had come to Montreal instead of the gulf coast), and when there was just enough time to get to my friend's film showing at 3:30 pm and then get to my watercolor vernissage, and then get home in time to maybe hang a bit before I threw myself into work.

Well, I have been sitting here waiting for 30 minutes now next to the door, and only the rain has shown up, not DB.

I suspect he forgot time changes. Or he's just late. I don't know. But it fucks up the whole day. I should have just taken a cab isntead of asking him to drive me. Goddamn goddamn. There are two other showings ot the film, but my friends would be at the first showing. And by the time the other showings are done (one at 4:15 and the other at 4:45) I don't think there is any way in hell that we'll get to the vernissage before it closes. I am pretty sure, being on a Sunday, that it ends at 5pm. And it is across town from the film. Goddamn goddamn.

And here I missed getting enough sleep, rushed like an insane person to walk the dog, had a shower, actually put on a cute skirt, AND was ready and waiting at the door on time.

I really thought at first he was just a few minutes late, like 10 minutes, and we could still make it. But now that it is half an hour late, and there isn't really any traffic today that I can see, I am guessing he fucked up the time change. Even though we spoke last night about 9pm.

Fuck. This puts me in a tired, cranky mood, impatient and pressed for time, which is exactly NOT what I wanted if I took a few hours off from getting ready for San Fran and taxes. I slept really badly, too stressed about how much I need to do before I go... I am about 4 days behind in everything because of the neverending South Korea work, and I just couldn't fall asleep though I was so tired.

But I thought, oh, I'll be up, showered, dressed cute, and have a break from three to five pm with a fun guy.

And it wasn't even raining. Fuckity fuckity fuckity.

If he doesn't get here within the next fifteen minutes, we won't make it to the second showing either, and then it is almost pointless to go out.


Don't rely on other people. When one is alone, one can always change plans... grab a taxi, a bus, hitchhike whatever. Sigh.

I hope he doesn't do this when he drives me to the airport on Wed night, or I'll be one pissed off lady.


Well, it didn't work. I thought starting an entry would be like lighting a cigarette and he'd show up. Nope. Didn't work at all.

I"ll go put in a load of laundry. That should help.

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previous meanderings - future past

Goodbye Michael. May your next life be kinder to you. - Thursday, Jun. 25, 2009
Taking Care of Your Cows - Thursday, Jun. 25, 2009
Saint Joseph robs the cradle and eats spaghetti - Sunday, Jun. 14, 2009
sticky notes and broken irises - Friday, Jun. 12, 2009
The FOODCOMMANDER - Monday, Jun. 08, 2009


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