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Hold on to what is good even if it is a handful of earth.
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Hold on to what you must do even if it is a long way from here.
Hold on to life even when it is easier letting go.
Hold on to my hand even when I have gone away from you.
- Pueblo Blessing

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Sunday, Jun. 12, 2005 - 4:51 a.m.

Cost of the War in Iraq
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WARNING!!!! if you know me personally, you may read my diary, but if you do, you take the chance of hearing things you don't want to know, misunderstanding what I've written and being hurt by it. If you are unsure if it is ok to read, save yourself and me the grief and heartache, and ask first!!! Please note that this is a DIARY, ie my subjective feelings, hearsay, suppositions, and outpourings of ranting of the moment. It does not represent objective news, the whole of what I think of a topic or someone, or even a thought-out representation of any of the above. Keep that in mind. Thanks. * Here is a Diary Etiquette Read Me.

Hoard Newspapers Not Aminals (or Aminal crackers, not aminals!)

This is one of the more rotten.comesque topics I've seen for awhile. I was googling on shedding hair (my dog still hasn't properly shed her winter fur... and it is hot as heck outside. Totally insane... I keep brushing her, and some comes out each time, but she is still too furry... she shouldn't have fur in the spring or summer, just hair. grrrr).

It is animal hoarding. What a great name for it. I used to live down the street from a rundown house ... it was in a sort of industrial area that was very residential 50-100 yrs ago, but most homes were razed and industry moved in. It always had millions of cats running around it and the empty lot next to it. The empty lot always had lots of empty cans and chicken bones.

One day a neighbor brought us a tiny kitten that was all stuffed up with oozy eyes. I gave it a bath, and took it to the vet the next day. It was mortally ill, and had to be put down... I forget the disease... not feline leukemia but something very very contagious that affects the lungs and eventually the brain... the kitten in fact WAS walking erratically in the middle of the street when discovered. Thankfully my own cats were vaccinated so were ok.

But they raided the house down the street... apparently hundreds of starving and ill cats. So yeah, that is animal hoarding. It is a psychological illness that is masked as "caring for animals". The animals and the people living with them are living in hellish unsanitary conditions without proper food, water or cleanliness, usually without any veterinary care at all.

You can read the faqs here. Some photos to give a good idea of the sort of living conditions here. The photos do not surprise me. They totally correspond with what the house down my street looked like on the outside. Filthy, full of garbage, broken stuff, sick animals, feces, stink.

Very sad.

Me? Had a good day... got enough sleep, yay! Did my comic, had a tiff (or lost my patience whatever) about everyone and their feline telling me how my dog is hot (yes I know, it is 100 outside. of course she's hot. You're hot, i'm hot, your dog is hot, your plants are hot, my dog is hot. No she doesn't need to be shaved. No she doesn't need more water. She is not thirsty, she is hot. Yes I just offered her water, and she turned her head away, that is how I know she is not thirsty. No I am not mean and nasty cuz she doesn't have a bowl of water in front of her (she just turned away the bottle of water, remember!) No she isn't going to die cuz she's panting. All dogs pant to cool off instead of sweating. I am sweating and you aren't offering me water or tutt tutting about how sad I am to sweat like a pig. Yes all mammals except humans and whales perhaps (and pigs?) have hair, no humans do not run around shaving all the bears, and cows, bison on the prairies where it is 120 in the summer with not a tree in sight. Yes they are designed by nature to live through the summer. No I don't walk her in the sun. Yes she gets her long walk in the evening. Yes I think about how hot she must be. Yes I brushed her again to get rid of more hair. Yes I let her play in the water when I water the lawn and garden. No it is not good to constantly keep her wet cuz she doesn't dry and gets rot under her ears in her wet fur called hot spots and then needs antibiotics. No I don't make her lay outside even though it's cooler in the house.. .she chooses that herself.)

Yes I eventually lose patience. I try now to say "yes" to anything. yes and only yes. No explanations, apologies, educating people, dispelling myths or smartass comebacks. From now on "just say yes". ack.

I did get some work done on the south korea contract, but I fear i am behind. I also took off a couple hours to go to a party at a friend's. She and her boy will be moving to Australia and it was the last party at their loft. Their loft was one of them renovated ones.. where they took out all the huge multiple-pane windows that open and replaced them with huge singlepane windows that don't open. They have a great view. And their place is like a greenhouse gone insane, since they only have small windows that open about one out of every three. horrid.

It was so hot it was like melting just sitting there. Hard to eat the potluck. I did have a nice time though visiting people I don't see so often now the fetish club closed (the friend was one of the bartenders there). I also hit it off with another exfetishclub attendee... a rather cute guy who looks italian... turns out he is spanish, who is into comics and art. He cornered me and we chatted for over an hour and he took my # and gave me his. Unfortunately he lives way across town, so I won't be dropping by casually any time in the near future.

And his father was more insane than mine. He apparently always wanted to be an artist and his father didn't like that, so when he caught him drawing once, he put his fingers into the hinge side of the door, and slammed the door on his hand, and broke all his fingers. Dang. Now his dad's dead and he's glad. Boy. Some people are just not very good parents are they? Well, Spanish Guy is not going to be one to begrudge me begrudging my father. (who btw has called four or five times in the past three weeks to chat, and I have either been not home or on the phone already so he just left messages. Do I call back? do I pick up? Do I act like he was never miserable and nasty and I threw him out of my house? I have no energy to actually tell him what I think. It seems so not worth it. All these years of putting my foot down. And now when I tell him he is being an ass and it is not acceptable he just thinks it is that *I* am so *particular* about how people talk to me.

No, do not shout at me "GROW UP GROW UP GROW UP" nor sneer, nor wrinkle your nose. Those things are not acceptable, I don't care what you think. But it is just not worth the energy arguing anymore.

No I won't pick up.
Maybe I'll send a father's day card. That'll do it. And he can leave another message about his orchids and travels. Yeah.

Anyways, Spanish Guy is rather cute. And nice to talk to. And seems to have a sense of humour. And likes oil painting and comics and obviously attended a fetish club, whatever that means. But what can one judge in an hour? We'll see.

OK< it is past 5am, and I really really want to keep getting up at 12:30 noon having slept enough.

Gotta scan in my comics. And another one that I wrote in, in German, as per the requests of someone who emailed me who wants to use a page for a sex-ed discussion group in Germany. Very cool.


and don't hoard the aminals eh!

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previous meanderings - future past

Goodbye Michael. May your next life be kinder to you. - Thursday, Jun. 25, 2009
Taking Care of Your Cows - Thursday, Jun. 25, 2009
Saint Joseph robs the cradle and eats spaghetti - Sunday, Jun. 14, 2009
sticky notes and broken irises - Friday, Jun. 12, 2009
The FOODCOMMANDER - Monday, Jun. 08, 2009

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