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Hold on to what is good even if it is a handful of earth.
Hold on to what you believe even if it is a tree which stands by itself.
Hold on to what you must do even if it is a long way from here.
Hold on to life even when it is easier letting go.
Hold on to my hand even when I have gone away from you.
- Pueblo Blessing

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Sunday, Feb. 20, 2005 - 3:14 a.m.

Cost of the War in Iraq
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Send Good Energy the Rockstar Way

mmm, when I go to bed at 2 or 3 instead of 6 or 8 I tell ya the day is shorter. Or at least the part I have left to work after 11 pm when I get in from walking the dog is infinitely puny... I have not yet adjusted my "feeling of time" expectations.

Though I have just looked through the Leo's Dog illos yet to work on and it DOES seem to be coming along slowly. God I hope I'll have it done in time.

I am also being really critical of it... in that I feel myself stressing and the more I stress the more I tighten up. Of course many people, esp those who are not artists, will see "tightening up" as "better drawn", ie less messiness. I call it um, ucky. I had started off so nice and loose and brushy at the very start. And I am losing it. I am overworking things. There is still hope. But there is a huge difference between the first images I worked on when I was fresh from my watercolor class with big hopes of better artwork in this book, and the stuff I am doing now which looks sort of deadened. Being too careful and not intuitive enough.

Oh well.

It'll be what it is, is what it'll be.

Now I wish I had another six months. I'd scrap it all and do it over again in acrylics or something. painterly. Haha. That is a different me. The one who dashes off five foot paintings in two nights. Those are the ones that end up the best. yup.

On another front, as I mentioned, my doctor has given up on the foot cream and is giving me oral fungicides. Just in case I have mold growing inside my ears or whatnot you know.

And I decided to get the prescription filled at a different pharmacy. This is a tiny family owned affair, only drugs. No easter candies or post office, photoalbums or valentines cards. Just a pharmacy. Owned by a vietnamese family. And I am SO glad I changed. They filled my prescription. But also the young woman eating noodles crosslegged on a chair behind the counter (I suspect her mom is the pharmacist, or the pharmacist is her mom), suggested I soak my feet in water with sea salt, which elicited emphatic nodding from the pharmacist lady and also the man in the store (the father?). The pharmacist then continued in some other language, which translated into "buy new boots" (I am good there... I bought new boots AND new insoles already), "put boots and shoes on electric heater to dry them so they don't stay humid" which I already do. So I got told "we give non-pill advice to do here to get well"... how cool is that? I also got a package of sugarfree gum for being a new customer and they came out to pet my dog (apparently they have a pomeranian since mom doesn't like dog hair).

So here's to small independent pharmacists. yay.

On a third front, or perhaps up ahead or maybe behind... I got a horrid phone call this evening. A friend, and a guy I went out with for a wee bit (like 10 days) ...btw that is one person, not two... apparently was stabbed on Thursday night at least three times including in the neck by some young 19 yr old guy he welcomed to stay at his place while the guy was on a bad acid trip. Fortunately my friend lives right across the street from a hospital... they called the cops but realized they could get there before the cops even arrived... so the hospital was actually waiting for him when he arrived. And immediately sent him in an ambulance to a more specialized hospital.

I don't know if it is positive that he was still walking, or if it was negative he was running around and probably pumping his life's blood all over the bloody world by walking there. But apparently he is in critical condition. He's only 39, has a wonderful girlfriend who has three kids. I hope to hell he'll recover and be fine. God. What a horrid phone call.

Rockstar we call him.

Get better Rockstar... we's a pullin for ya!!

I told my friends to make sure they called me if he took a turn for the worse or if he is well enough to have visitors. I'll be over there in a jiffy if he wants. Dang.

Yay for bad acid trips. Imagine stabbing some friend in the neck while you think they are evil incarnate for a coupla hours. Fuck. What a way to ruin a coupla lives. The cops picked up the young man of course. Shit. I wonder if wielding a knife under the influence of acid is analogous to driving under the influence of alcohol. Does it get you a lesser or a greater sentence. How bout "attempted assassination of the bad guys, sorry your honor, I was mistaken though about who was the bad guys".


Keep your fingers crossed for my Rockstar friend. please. And if you're like really all Christian and bornagain like, please don't pray for him. Not in that way. He's so not into it huh. Really really not. This is a worships the devil edgar allen poe sort of guy. A sweet one.


End of entry for today.
another day of painting tomorrow. And no running around or meeting up with friends (who happen to be hours late). Monday I have a meeting at suppertime. So tomorrow is the "give the Leo's Dog a huge push" day.


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previous meanderings - future past

Goodbye Michael. May your next life be kinder to you. - Thursday, Jun. 25, 2009
Taking Care of Your Cows - Thursday, Jun. 25, 2009
Saint Joseph robs the cradle and eats spaghetti - Sunday, Jun. 14, 2009
sticky notes and broken irises - Friday, Jun. 12, 2009
The FOODCOMMANDER - Monday, Jun. 08, 2009


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