Monday, Oct. 11, 2004 - 10:34 p.m.
Cost of the War in Iraq
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Long Wordy Parental Dispatches Never Mean any Well
So, while I was out, my father sent me a 9 page letter by fax. Hmmm... vote's out. Should I read it.
Let me see. The last times he sent me long letters it was to tell me how I was this fucked up person alone and disliked in the world who would only be accepted back into his family if I changed myself to his liking.
The last times I walked out on my mother or hung up on her (I really can see they either learned the same communications skills at home, or picked them up from each other or something) she sent me long "you are a fucked up miserable ass who better shape up or ship out" letters.
I end up ranting in my head if not aloud for days or years.
So, Do I read it, hoping maybe he has gone back to being the semi-changed somewhat reasonable post-therapy, post-angermanagement class guy he was shaping up to be a coupla years ago, and hope it sets some sort of middle ground?
Or do I put it aside and read it years from now, maybe saving myself tons of grief, but also maybe depriving myself of any apology it perhaps contains.
The weird thing is both my parents rant about their childhoods, each other other people, and then tell me I am negative and defensive and need to grow up and get over it.
And most of my therapists have told me I seem to have been born mature. Yes I get angry, but in almost every case they said "now that was a situation where the appropriate response would be anger".
Hmmm. well, yeah. I'll write more later.
Going out with doggies...IFF she isn't limping too badly... I cut a hard candy (strawberry or cherry I think) out from between her footpads... it was totally stuck to the hair and causing her to limp. But she is walking worse now that it is out rather than better. Dang. Had to leave her, and get the doggy trailer to fetch her home this afternoon. So we will ATTEMPT doggy walkies now...
Give me your two cents worth people.
aaaaah, you know I am too curious and snoopy to not read it. It is more a question of when.
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Goodbye Michael. May your next life be kinder to you. - Thursday, Jun. 25, 2009
*inspired by Chaosdaily