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Hold on to what is good even if it is a handful of earth.
Hold on to what you believe even if it is a tree which stands by itself.
Hold on to what you must do even if it is a long way from here.
Hold on to life even when it is easier letting go.
Hold on to my hand even when I have gone away from you.
- Pueblo Blessing

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Thursday, Mar. 06, 2008 - 10:32 p.m.

Cost of the War in Iraq
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WARNING!!!! if you know me personally, you may read my diary, but if you do, you take the chance of hearing things you don't want to know, misunderstanding what I've written and being hurt by it. If you are unsure if it is ok to read, save yourself and me the grief and heartache, and ask first!!! Please note that this is a DIARY, ie my subjective feelings, hearsay, suppositions, and outpourings of ranting of the moment. It does not represent objective news, the whole of what I think of a topic or someone, or even a thought-out representation of any of the above. Keep that in mind. Thanks. * Here is a Diary Etiquette Read Me.

No Space for Art

Somehow, I, a supposed artist, illustrator and all, have managed to reduce my possible art-making space to about zero.

OK, I have TWO ROOMS! No, one large double room. Two drawing tables. Shelves of art supplies and drawers of drawing paper. But do I have any place to work?

OK, if I remove the immediately movable reference books, text printouts and tax paperwork from the table in front of me, there IS a space about three feet by 18 inches that can be used for artwork, and is. Squeezed between a pile of papers, framed photo of the kiddo, pile of bottles of ink and my scanner and coffee warmer, there is the space I use for illustration. But, really, out of TWO ROOMS and TWO DRAWING TABLES, one of which is 30x48" and the other which is 36x60". That is really sad.

I don't know what happened to have me whittle down the actual functional artmaking space down to this sliver. But I tell you, it isn't condusive to schmucking around in the paint and getting my hands dirty.

Really... the available space actively being used in the house by the learning of mandarin is larger.

Oh dear.

And now I should be working on the sketches for the characters of a new chapterbook novel for 8-10 yr olds. I have started, but they aren't finished enough to send to the editor and author. I was going to have them in their hands on Friday.

Oh. Friday. That's tomorrow isn't it. And it is 10:38 pm.

And I feel tired and unmotivated.

Every day for the past week I have felt motivated... at 9am. And then by 1pm when small son goes to nap, I feel tired. and then by 8:30-9pm when he goes to sleep, I feel exhausted and just want to surf the internet and do pointless things that take little creativity... like practicing writing chinese characters. hah!

Well, I think I'll lay down for a nap.

Then I'll get up and do the sketches. And email them. Yes I will.

It will just take a few minutes.

It is not the minutes that are lacking.
It is the motivation.
The space for drawing in my persona/life right now directly reflects the space allotted in my studio for drawing right now.

deary me.


On day 9 of her laryngitis. aaaagh

Listening to right now: Music Today: "I want you to want me" Damhnait Doyle

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previous meanderings - future past

Goodbye Michael. May your next life be kinder to you. - Thursday, Jun. 25, 2009
Taking Care of Your Cows - Thursday, Jun. 25, 2009
Saint Joseph robs the cradle and eats spaghetti - Sunday, Jun. 14, 2009
sticky notes and broken irises - Friday, Jun. 12, 2009
The FOODCOMMANDER - Monday, Jun. 08, 2009


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