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Hold on to what is good even if it is a handful of earth.
Hold on to what you believe even if it is a tree which stands by itself.
Hold on to what you must do even if it is a long way from here.
Hold on to life even when it is easier letting go.
Hold on to my hand even when I have gone away from you.
- Pueblo Blessing

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Saturday, Dec. 03, 2005 - 6:57 p.m.

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WARNING!!!! if you know me personally, you may read my diary, but if you do, you take the chance of hearing things you don't want to know, misunderstanding what I've written and being hurt by it. If you are unsure if it is ok to read, save yourself and me the grief and heartache, and ask first!!! Please note that this is a DIARY, ie my subjective feelings, hearsay, suppositions, and outpourings of ranting of the moment. It does not represent objective news, the whole of what I think of a topic or someone, or even a thought-out representation of any of the above. Keep that in mind. Thanks. * Here is a Diary Etiquette Read Me.

Maybe Just

I think that if a guy will give you a hug and offer a massage when you say you are down and feeling shitty and have a stress knot in your shoulderblade,

invites you in, keeps you to show you his music,

asks if you couldn't perhaps meet the person you are mentoring at the coffeeshop instead of at your place so he could eat with you,

asks what you are doing later, and decides he might just not go to his friend's place that night if you might come by,

works on his music at his place while you work on your work for three hours,

plays music on his guitar and sings for and with you for another hour,

tells you the stories of how he broke his knee, and his relationship and becoming a parent tales for another three hours,

tells you while hugging you that he'd really like to sleep with you (and means sleep, ie cuddle),

finds you a tshirt to sleep in,

cuddles you all night,

doesn't answer the phone and then unplugs it in the morning when his ex calls,

doesn't answer the door when she rings the doorbell and

says he really has to TODAY tell her, that really, she has to get in her mind that it has been over finished kaput for a year and a half and that hanging out with him and the kids does not constitute getting back together,

kisses and strokes and holds you and tells you that you are cute (as a button), and that he wants to take it slow.

says it is ok, and he is not easy to scare when you say you are really an emotional person, and
tell him that when he told you he was unavailable you cried all night and didn't sleep,

Doesn't freak out when his kid um, lets himself into the house unannounced via some hidden door (his mom's place is next door), and comes into the bedroom and sees you two in bed chatting together (thank god for wearing tshirts and underwear),

makes you breakfast and kisses and holds you and chats for another two hours,

and asks you what you are doing tonight that he would like to come over....



It might mean he actually maybe does like you after all.

Gotta go vacuum. Too much doggy hair.


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previous meanderings - future past

Goodbye Michael. May your next life be kinder to you. - Thursday, Jun. 25, 2009
Taking Care of Your Cows - Thursday, Jun. 25, 2009
Saint Joseph robs the cradle and eats spaghetti - Sunday, Jun. 14, 2009
sticky notes and broken irises - Friday, Jun. 12, 2009
The FOODCOMMANDER - Monday, Jun. 08, 2009


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